Madissyn Fredericks, Licensed Professional Counselor, Symmetry Counseling
For many people, their wedding day is a day they have imagined for their entire lives. The flowers, the cake, the dress, and the person they are going to share their life are things they have envisioned for years. While the wedding planning period may seem fun and exciting, it is also a time filled with immense stressors that can have a negative effect on your relationship. Some of these stressors include making many big decisions, expectations, expenses, and new roles in your relationship that you didn’t anticipate. You may notice you and your partner arguing more, getting frustrated, or feeling anxious which may lead to one or both of you questioning the relationship. If you are feeling a mix of these emotions, then you aren’t alone. There are many people who feel overwhelmed by the planning process and there are some relationships that don’t make it through. However, there are things you can do to make wedding planning a more positive experience for you and your relationship. Below are a few ways cope with pre-wedding stress and planning so that it doesn’t negatively affect your relationship or your marriage moving forward.
There are many stressors that may come up throughout the wedding planning process that affect your relationship. Now is the time to nurture not only your romantic relationship but also the other important relationships in your life such as family and friends. Continue having date nights, cooking dinners together, and having fun with friends. Surround yourselves with the people who support and nourish your relationship during a time when stressors may take a toll on it.
Whatever the stressor may be, make sure you are communicating with your partner. It may be different visions for your wedding, lack of effort, work conflict, or even family issues, but it is crucial to maintain good communication. Try setting a time two or three times per week where you sit down and make decisions about the wedding together. This time can be used to plan or communicate frustrations and concerns on either end. Doing this allows you the opportunity to face difficulties together and be heard by your partner.
You begin your engagement by making the decision together that you want to be married. It is important to carry this unity through to the day you say “I do” and beyond. Deciding the venue, the cake flavor, the guest list, the flowers, etc. should be a team effort that is not tainted by the views and opinions of others. Look at the challenges you have to face as a unit and make this day about the two of you and celebrating your commitment to one another.
If you are currently experiencing pre-wedding stress in your relationship, try some of these tools to help your relationship through this stressful time. If you feel like you need some more guidance, it may be helpful to connect with a therapist. Contact Symmetry Counseling at 312-578-9990 to schedule an appointment with one of our very skilled therapists today!