Marriage Counseling Chicago

Madissyn Fredericks, Licensed Professional Counselor, Symmetry Counseling Hearing the phrase, “Can we talk?”, can often invoke an intense feeling of fear and uneasiness. Using your voice in relationships can feel scary as it requires vulnerability. Who would want to speak up when there is a risk of judgement, rejection, or conflict? While these fears are valid, they have most likely been shaped by previous painful experiences and interactions. It may be surprising, but failure to speak up…

Everyone has a different idea of what a “perfect” and “happy” relationship is like. Not all relationships are the same, but having an idea of what makes a healthy relationship is important. This blog will provide you some ideas of what a healthy relationship can entail of. Comfortable Pace. Make sure that you are not rushing the relationship due to a “timeline” that you might have for yourself. Making sure that you are taking the time to…

In my previous blog, Avoid the Four Horsemen, I discussed details of Dr. John Gottman’s Four Horsemen of communication: criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. When these four communication styles were witnessed within a couple, Dr. Gottman’s research was able to determine they can be predictive indicators of the end of a relationship. Although these four communication styles were a predictor of the end of a relationship, recognizing that the Four Horsemen are a part of your communication…

We likely have all had a disagreement with someone in our life. As human beings, we have different life experiences; we grew up with different values, have different personalities, have different wants, and needs. With all of these differences, it is almost as if disagreements are bound to happen at one point or another. While disagreements may often lead to arguments, we need to be cognizant that it is okay to disagree with someone. What matters more…

All couples fight— in fact, the process of rupture and repair can actually be strength building. The key as to whether an argument or difficult conversation makes a pair stronger lies in HOW a couple fights. Adaptive Disagreement Strategies S L O W D O W N Take a breath. Don’t act and react on impulse. If you need to, take an agreed upon period of time to collect yourself and your thoughts so that you can…

Getting angry is a normal part of life and, like it or not, it is also a normal occurrence in relationships. Anger can be caustic and harmful between two people if it is not handled well. It can exacerbate problems, prevent productive communication, and inhibit problem solving. Understanding your anger can help you to control or change how you respond to it. What you FEEL from the EMOTION Even though we use the words emotions and feelings…

All couples fight. In fact, the process of rupture and repair can actually be strength-building. The key as to whether an argument or difficult conversation makes a pair stronger lies in HOW a couple fights. Maladaptive Disagreement Strategies An eye for an eye This can also look like fighting to fight. Have you ever been in a heated conversation and without thinking, you respond to something hurtful in a somewhat attacking manner? “Yeah, well you did x,…