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Chicago Counselor


Friendship: How Do I Explore Positive Changes That I Want to Make In My Life?

July 5, 2022

Plascilla Foster, LPC, NCC As a result of the Covid- 19 pandemic, many people have been forced to make changes. These changes may have been things that one has been putting off for years or unexpected changes that one needs to adjust to and accommodate quickly. Change can be a remarkable thing in someone’s life depending on how one chooses to look at the circumstance. If you feel like you need to make changes in your life…

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Will They Stay Married or Choose Divorce?

June 30, 2022

Plascilla Foster, LPC, NCC As Season 14 of Married at First Sight ends soon, making predictions on which couples will say “yes” on decision day or choose to get a divorce can be remarkably interesting. Based on what I saw this season, I predict that only two couples will say “yes” on decision day, and here is why. Lindsey and Mark  According to Gottman and Silver (2015), the biggest predictor of divorce is contempt. Contempt in a…

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What Is Psychological Trauma?

June 29, 2022

Amanda Ann Gregory, LCPC, EMDR Certified Therapist  Over the past several decades, there has been more awareness of the prevalence of psychological trauma and of how trauma impacts individuals. Unfortunately, trauma has become a buzzword that tends to be used too often and incorrectly. Here are some facts to help you conceptualize psychological trauma correctly:  Psychological Trauma Is Not an Event or Experience  The most common mistake people make in defining psychological trauma is their sole focus…

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What Is Forgiveness?

June 28, 2022

Amanda Ann Gregory, LCPC, EMDR Certified  You’ve heard of forgiveness, but what does it actually mean? Harpercollins’ Dictionary (1989) defines “to forgive” as “to grant pardon for or remission of an offense, granting pardon to a person, ceasing to feel resentment, and canceling an indebtedness or liability.” However, forgiveness tends to be more complicated when it’s applied to real-life relationships.   Marriage and family therapist Bren Chasse described forgiveness from an evolutionary standpoint. He reports that “in early…

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What Are the Different Boundaries We Need to Set?

June 26, 2022

By: Zana Van Der Smissen, LPC Hello, and welcome back to another blog post! This week we will be discussing the different boundaries we need to set depending on the situation we are in. Boundaries are one of the most popular and important conversations that happen in therapy because as humans we are constantly wanting to find the perfect balance between taking care of ourselves and being a part of a community. That being said, we don’t…

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Understanding Communication Styles: What’s Yours? Part II

June 24, 2022

By: Bridgette W. Gottwald, LPC, NCC If you read my previous blog post, you learned about passive, aggressive, and passive-aggressive communicators. This second and final part of this two-part blog series about communication will discuss assertive communicators and the fluidity of communication styles. “To get to the next level of greatness depends on the quality of our culture, which depends on the quality of our relationships, which depends on the quality of our conversations. Everything happens through…

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Understanding Communication Styles: What’s Yours? Part I

June 23, 2022

By: Bridgette W. Gottwald, LPC, NCC Did you know that behavioral traits affect communication? Learning about and being able to understand communication styles can drastically improve your relationships. How knowledgeable or skilled you are in navigating difficult conversations depends upon your ability to connect with other people. According to Christian, “when communication breaks down, it’s often because the patterns and habits of how we communicate — our communication styles — get in the way.” In working to…

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Anxious and Overwhelmed? Let’s Start With Why the Chicken Crossed the Road

June 22, 2022

By Eric Dean JD, MBA, MA, MA, LPC, CADC How you interpret your experiences will have a significant impact on the way you feel about them. If you can change your perceptions of your experiences, you can change the way they make you feel.  How Our Perceptions and Interpretations Effect Out Feelings This is far from earth-shattering news. It is the basic premise of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), a modality in which the therapist works with the…

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Should I Give My Partner an Ultimatum?

June 21, 2022

Plascilla Foster, LPC, NCC  A Netflix series entitled “Ultimatum: Marry or Move On,” follows six couples. In each relationship, one partner wants to get married, and the other partner is unsure. Reasons that one partner may choose to give an ultimatum are fear that their time is being wasted, wanting validation that they are important in the relationship, wanting to feel heard, wanting to feel seen, needing to be a priority, desiring to share the same goals…

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Why Is Co-Regulation So Important?

June 20, 2022

Zoe Mittman Licensed Social Worker  “Just calm down.” “It’s not a big deal, just forget about it.” “It shouldn’t be having this much of an impact on you.” Have you heard these statements before? Has anybody ever said these to you when you were feeling upset? It may be that these statements made you feel worse. They sure would make me feel that way. These statements represent a lack of empathy — the inability of someone else…

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